Independence is an awesome thing and there's nothing more attractive than a woman who has her stuff together. This is the woman who is career oriented, driven, and motivated toward her goals in life. She has her own house, her own car, her own money in the bank, and takes care of her responsibilities. She juggles all aspects of her life and blends them all seamlessly.....through it all she shines! SOUNDS GOOD! (In my highly sarcastic voice-lol).....but when everyone leans on you...who do you lean on? Who do you reach out to when it seems like the pressure is building up and you want to avoid dropping the "proverbial" ball. After all people are depending on you...because of you they eat, because of you they live, because of you the world goes around ....right...WRONG. ALL independent women I know (including myself) have wrestled with the prospect of reaching out for help, delegating responsibility, or just sitting back and letting someone else take care of you. Many of us hold steadfast to the belief that if you want something done right.you have to do it yourself. Although it's great to DO...there has to be balance. There has to be a point where you entrust some of your daily responsibilities to someone who you trust and deem capable of handling "certain things" with the same tenacity and excellence that you would. Delegating is simply taking a simple task, wrapping up into a neat package, and handing it to someone else. Since there is only one you, you have to prioritize and distinguish what needs your hands on interaction and what can be handled by your trustee 3rd party. I have learned, and I am still learning that there are tasks that only I can do and there are tasks that I can reach out to others to get done.

The 5 rules of reaching out are 1) reach out to God first and ask for direction 2)  find a great support system (Hint: You already have one if you have an awesome mom like mine, a close friend, a family member, or other trusted 3rd party) 3) Utilize your support system 4) Outline your expectations and needs 5) Reward and express gratitude to those in your support system. (After all, they do help you keep your sanity). Those around you know “how you roll”, they know you can make it happen, and they know they can call on you. It’s time to reach out to those same people and help them to help you by accepting their advances.

Sometimes our past disappointments can stop us from asking others for help for fear that they will either say no, mess up, walk out, or let us down in some way shape or form. I literally hated to use the words "I need" because I had made up in my mind that I didn’t NEED anybody. The word need just sounded so ummm....well.... NEEDY. We have to move past that and realize that God removed certain people for a reason and replace those people with those who will provide the help you need. He needs you to be in tip top shape so that He can use you. Past hurts helped us to build our character and made us strong enough to stand alone....Great! Hooray! and Owww!..BUT that's not the end of the story. The hurts came to shape us and move on...they didn’t come to set up camp and stay forever. I’m realizing and teaching others that you do NEED. You need time with God, you need "ME TIME", you need a minute to sit down, you need to let someone help, you need to be happy, and you need to be grateful, you need to be healthy, and you need to be sane. If you don’t meet YOUR needs then you can’t meet THEIR needs. Now that I have totally exhausted the word need I will close by saying "WE need you to put YOU first Ms. Independent.

Philippians 4:6,7.
6 Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you NEED, and thank him for all he has done. 7 Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

 4 Questions: Are you are pulled in a million directions? Do you have a ton of people that rely on you? Do you ever take time out to do something for yourself?....and Lastly, Who will  take care of you if you don't take care of yourself?

Today's topic has to do with self care and simply remembering that you have to take care of you no matter how important you are to those around you. In fact, the more important you are to those around you, the more obligated you are to take care of yourself. Taking care of others is a natural instinct that women have, instinctively there is something that clicks in our heads that tells us if it has to get done then we have to be the ones that do it. If your anything like me, you'd rather do it yourself to make sure that it gets done with a level of excellence instead of just barely making the grade. Although there is nothing wrong with "getting things done", there needs to be a minute, hour, or day where nothing gets done. Doing nothing does not necessarily mean that you are not being productive. The mind, body, and spirit all need time to process, recuperate, and recharge in order to do it all over again tomorrow. When we constantly give and pour into others without REPLENISHING ourselves, we will find that we are left with an empty jar and a full mind. Spend some time with you, get to know yourself on a new level, and give all of your worries to God. After all, He's fully equipped to handle all of your cares, offer peace & solace as He works on your behalf, and provide a solution that will always be in your best interest. Challenge: Pick any day this week and choose a block of time (hours or day) to turn off your cell phone and indulge in something that makes you feel great, whether it's a good book, a Mani & Pedi, or a drive to nowhere. Let me know how much fun you had with your new bestie.....she's the coolest!

Matthew 11:28 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."